Sunday, 27 September 2015

Eastwood Hall, Eastwood

I guess somebody's not confident about the results of their beauty room. A real shame.

Message to Eastwood Hall, Eastwood

"Dear Sir/Madam/proprietary type,

I am enquiring as to the exact amount a wood chuck could chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood. I jest; unless you know the answer of course.

A very good friend of mine has a daughter who is engaged to be married and is currently seeking venues. While most boast luxury, fine detail and perfection I was hoping to become involved with the preparations as I know they are not as well off as ourselves.

I have acquired table cloths and seat covers from an electronic bidding website and was hoping this may save in cleaning bills. Likewise I was hoping to supply a red carpet, although sourcing such without existing stains is proving to be a nightmare. I realise these are likely to be drinks but I don't wish to take any risks.

In short, would my involvement be a possibility? I look forward to hearing the answer to one or both of my questions as I was asked the initial phrase at a formal dinner.

Kind regards,

T. Lander, esq."

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