Four Seasons Hotel, Dogmersfield

Grand news fresh in from Colchester.

Message from Wivenhoe House, Colchester

"Dear Mr. Lander,

I am more than happy to tell you that although our hotel is close to the University campus, we are not affect by any such pranks you were subjected to in Russia.

The hotel is situated on the edge of the campus, so out of reach of day-to-day noises, and should you wish to walk through the grounds, please rest assured our security personnel have a visible presence at all times.

I hope this information is of service to you, Sir, and, please, if you have any more questions do not hesitate to contact us.

Wishing you a good evening,

Kind Regards

*** ***

Front of House

Wivenhoe House Hotel"

Message to Wivenhoe House, Colchester

"Dear ***,

That's excellent news. There's nothing worse than rowdy, naked students. Except, perhaps, rowdy naked pensioners.

Many Thanks.

Kind regards,

T. Lander, esq."

This week I'm continuing on the un-British theme.

Message to the Four Seasons Hotel, Dogmersfield

"Dear Sir/Madam/proprietary type,

My apologies, but this Country I am not from. Staying I am with residents and assured me they did that hotel of yours is very good a lot. Hoping soon to stay with you I am but first question that must be answered if you are willing I have.

Swimming pool on your website very nice I have found. Bringing my wife with me I am hoping and privacy big priority for renting pool the one evening. For one evening how much for my wife and I but nobody in with us?

Your time is many thank you and I email return look forward to very soon.

Kind regards,

T. Lander, esq."